All new year's eve event have to be cancel. The government pulled back all the permits for all these events. A few days back, there were temporary built ups at the ExxonMobil open air car park for the KLCC count down. The roof was built, lightings were fixed, the stage, the speakers... everything. And along the path in the KLCC park, sections were sealed for the fireworks arrangement. They built scaffoldings and places the "missiles" on them, properly wrapped up in plastic to keep rain water out.

But today, all is taken down, all dismantled, all is cleared out. So... what's everyone going to do? When the clock strikes 12 on the 1st of January 2005, pray, pray for the victims and for their family.

As for me, I'll be down south in Singapore. I'll be there to visit my brother who just returned from his internship in U.S. I might get to celebrate the new years there, but I doubt it. I want to try to get my hair straighten there though. Hm.... $$ is a problem because I flat broke.

Anyways, I had a look at my year's resolution for this year, and... HAHAHA I really suck man. Out of the six, I manage to fulfil only 2. Then again, I'm glad my year was my year. This year will be different, because I'm in a different stage in life. Got to be more mature setting my resolutions and goals this year.

I seriously have no mind for my goals at this point in life, in better words, I'm clueless right now. I don't have to work tomorrow, so I guess I better think about it before I go to sleep.

What are my goals? What do I seek? What do I hunger for? Life? Knowledge? Wisdom? Experience? Power? Money? Friends? Family? and Love? I want all of it, but one can't be greedy, no one can have all. So... I'll be the first person to have all of it? Yes, yes please. I'll work towards all of it.

Fairol, my colleague, sent me a one minute video clip of the Tsunami that happen in Batu Ferringi (Penang) because of the Indo quake. I do not have a webspace to upload it and to show it to you all. So, feel free (It doesn't matter if you don't know me) to leave me your email in my message box and I'll mail it to you. Make sure you have at least a 760kb of space left in your mailbox. Check your junk mail also la ok. Might end up there.

A sneek preview on the short clip. In Cantonese.
Lady1: Wah! lei dai li kor! Li kor ho keng ah! (Wah look at it! It's huge)
Lady2: Kom keng, hm thong hai... (It's huge, maybe its...)
Lady1: Lei tai tho mo?! (Can you see it!?) La mei geh ho keng. (The one at the back is huge)
.
. as the smaller wave hit the shore *wahhhhhh* *laughter of amusement*
.
. *uhhh* *ahhhh* *WAHHHHHHHHHHHH* second wave, bigger this time
.
.*WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*
. third enexpected wave
man: chow chow chow! (run run run!)
*laughter* *giggles*
man: ngor kin sam sap sai (I'm soaked)

Oh yeah, The Sound Of Music the broad way style will be showing at Istana Budaya from 12th of March 2005 to 3rd of April 2005. Anyone interested? I'm planning to go on Saturday 19th March, 8.30pm show. Going for the Category A tickets, RM252 but I'm getting the tickets for RM152 (RM252 less 40% for Maxis One Club members). I've got to buy the tickets before 8th January 2005 for the discount to apply. So... get back to me ASAP yah! I don't want to go alone =(

My deepest condolences to the people who have been affected by the Indonesian earth quake.

Who would ever think that Malaysia (under the no-quake zone) would also be affected? Jaya told me that CNN reported that Hotel Mandrine Oriental (just next to KLCC and only 5 minutes walk away from Menara ExxonMobil) and Hotel Crown Prince felt the quake too. Selayang hospital evacuated all it’s patient, that proves the seriousness of the quake. A family friend of mine who is staying in low cost flats in Sungai Buloh also felt the quake. Their TV fell off the TV shelf and broke. Yes, it was that bad.

I've just received an email from Thomas, he's fine. Thank god. He says his home is future off uphill in. The below pictures are real pictures of the condition in Phuket, taken by one of Thomas's customers. More can be found here.

I always believe that everyone truly know what they want. We are all not confused, we just choose to be because the truth is not something we want to face or live with. Why do all of us complain to one another about our problems? Why do we all need to talk and need someone to listen? Why do we all act so frustrated when all we have to do is take action? And, why do we ask for comments, ideas, views and advice but end up sticking to what we have decided in the first place?

Well, that’s because we all know what we want. We all have already decided what we want in the first place. All the talking and asking around is just to get an extra confirmation of our actions. But then that confirmation do not come, it still doesn’t matter because we all have already decided right?

It’s like dressing up for a dinner party or shopping for a new outfit. Some of us spend the whole week thinking of what to wear, what accessories, what bag and shoe to wear. We even have a pre-dressing session just to see if the outfit comes out well. But … on the day of the dinner, your partner comes in, you’ll ask “Do I look ok?” Even if an affirmative answer is not received, and another half a day planning for a new outfit, we all always will end up wearing what we all planned out. (Now guys, let me teach you something, if you want to save a little time, “OK? No, you look better than ok” Then tell her that her bag/shoes/earrings goes well with the dress. You will get response like “Sure or not?” and she’ll go on and on again on how her other accessories will look better, well, bare with it a little ;p cos she will surely end up with the original outfit. However, if this doesn’t work, don’t sue me la kays)

That’s just one example. A very simple cliché example. But life is not that simple. Then again that was not my point, my point was… ok let me re phrase my sentence. I don’t want to go on and on about the same thing that I have already decided. So, if I come up to any of you ranting on and on about my thing, just smack my head and tell me that I already have the answer. But if I don’t, don’t come asking me tons of questions tempting me to rant la ok. I already know what I have to do. Its just that doing the right thing is not always a happy thing, that is why...

Nope, not blogging at work. I don't have to work today! Weee! It's the first time in a quite long time since I can wake up late and then continue sleeping in the afternoon. This is sure refreshing! *AHHH*

I want to wish all my family, friends and not forgetting all of you that reads my blog a very very Merry Christmas. I won't be in town to celebrate Christmas this year. I'll be going back to Ipoh for a relative's wedding dinner. I wished I didn't have to go but can't do anything about that.

Happy 21st!! Birthday to Brader Yo[o]ng Ching and Shelly! Won't get to go to Shelly's party, sad to say I'll be missing THE party of the year. All of my Taman SEA kaki's and PBSM kaki's will be there. It's like a reunion, Christmas and a birthday all in one. Zhong: update me and the happenings man!

And finally! I got some time to read all my fav blogs. I've been missing out so much since I've started working. I miss my morning surfing routine back when I wasn't working.

Ok... I should end here. Still got to pack. Will leave you with some pictures of my outing with my cous SJ last week.


SJ and bunny bunny me


aiyak...forgot his man.. Adrian I think. Zhong in red.


Whahahaha Thanks SJ!

Yes yes, I'm blogging from work again. Erm...correction, at work. I've got no Internet access remember. I found out that in order for me to access the internet, I much get a DOG (renamed to keep P&C stuff private) rating of higher that 5. Well, I'll work my way up there some day. Hopefully my job scope will require me to access the Internet (if not the WWW should be sufficient) then.

Anyway, this is my third day working on other people's work. I'm getting a hang of it already but I don't seem to be able to catch's people's mistake. I'm reviewing security reports now you see, I've got to kind of make sure everyone access and give access to servers according to the procedure. Wendy (my teacher, and also Jaga's team lead) told me for the report I'm reviewing, there should have 'problems' (we call it 'exception' in the workplace) every month. However, I have not come across any yet. I don't know if the people are following procedures or I'm just bad at my work at the moment. But never the less, I'm trying my best to do a good job.

Anyhow, I kind of have my aims and goals already. First aim; Get a life at the work place. I can't be eating lunch alone for the whole year! I need kaki lang's at work. I feel damn anti-social man....arghh I need to mingle!

Second aim; everyone is given folders of reports to review, I hope I can finish my load in time before 5pm everyday. I don't know how much reports I have to review yet because currently my team lead, Azmi and Wendy (another team lead aka my teacher) have not segregate any folders to me yet. But good also la, I'll be in charge of something different to the reports I'm review now, so ah, I'll be at the advantage among the new people because I know more.

That leads to my goal... can't blog it out tho... related to some P&C stuff.

I finally got my permanent ID today. Weee! I don't have to exchange my driving licence for my temporary ID anymore. I looked extra red in the picture tho.

Anyway, the thief returned my magazine to my desk today. I was at my desk early today. No magazine yet. Then we both had to attend the BPR (Business Practice Review) at 8am so we left for the meeting room together. After that I left for lunch and came back, nope still no magazine yet, no boss to be seen too.

I think she took half the day off again. Her son is really sick. Diarrhea and vomiting for 2 days already. Even the doctor can't diagnose the sickness at this early stage. I pity her, she's so worried for her son. I can see that she can't really work well too. I think she's a good mom, she loves him a lot.

Ok back to the story, after lunch I was away from my desk again. I went to another terminal nearer to my "trainer". When I came back to my desk to pack up and go home, I saw the magazine. Magic yah... then I don't see it then now I do. CHIP'XXON (My CHIP magazine with ExxonMobil) not chipsmore.

There's a theif on my floor. It's damn obvious it's that fellar. ARGH...I can't believe it man. I've got to be careful.

Since I wasn't assign any work yet, I was asked by immediate boss to help my other colegue with some back log. I wasn't in my cubicle for the whole day. I left my newspaper and my CHIP magazine on my desk but my magazine was missing when I returned to pack up my stuff to go home. Ok fine, it's just a magazine, what I didn't like was the fact that I saw my magazine on another person's table! Some papers were covering it tho but I'm very sure that was my magazine. I acted blur and asked for my magazine and guess what the culprit said!? "Magazine? Got meh?" !!! What the heck man, yeeahhhh! I've really got to be careful now when ever I'm out of my cubicle. I didn't think I would be working with such persons.

Other than that, things got interesting at work today. I got to work on other people's work. I was kind of worried at first because I wasn't ready to handle people's work! It's not some thing I was trained or briefed on. My boss just kind of ran through the procedures and process me and violah! I'm on my own. I started just like that, no shadowing work that Jaga (the other new head in the department) was doing. The initial process was all ok but things got really difficult and confusing after lunch. My boss wasn't there to answer my questions because she left for a meeting. At a time one of the applications crashed one me. *sign* I didn't know what to do because I need my boss to logon to that application because I have no authority yet to use the application. In the end I used another colleagues ID and password.

Got to wake up extra early tomorrow because I will have a BPR, nope not business process reengineering, but a Business Practise something briefing at 8am! (until 12 noon, OMG) Well, I hope the briefing will highlight that STEALING FROM YOUR COMPANY AND COLLEGUES is SHAMEFUL AND NOT ETHICAL! …my magazine… sobb sobb… I’ve just received it by mail today and haven’t even got the time to finish reading it.

Me and my scroll!


Me me me meeee


My family members that came to see me on stage for that 2 seconds of glory. Mom, grandma, sis, me, dad and my grand pa


Me and Jin


The guys. Dave, Kwang, Sean


Me, Eva, Chun Hin and Chern Ping

I realized that I have less and less time for blogging. Spending 9 hours at
work and 2 hours traveling to and back from work is taking up a lot of my
24 hours. I have to make sure I sleep not later than 10pm at night so I can
manage to get to work on time. *Yawn* Why do I have time to blog today?
Well...it's because I got fired. Sad huh, just my fourth day at work and I
blew it. I'm not going to talk about what happen because...aie.

Anyway, I was at Atmosphere with SJ and a few others on Saturday. We ladies
got to get in for free. I didn't know who was spinning that night but he
surely is the bomb. The DJ didn't spin new tracks, instead he picked past
well known tracks. The crowd loved it. We went off early though, the people
got hungry. Apa la.

Yesterday, I went to Crabman's church's Christmas celebration thingy. My
dad took the car out so I was late for the event and missed Crabman's
performance. HAHAHA yep yep, he performed. I don't know what he did though,
singing I think.

After the event, I then went over to Daren's birthday party. Last year at
his party, we all meet his nephew Scoot, Daren calls him Scoottie. Little
Scoottie was at the party. He is one naughty little fellar. Ham Sap also!
(Ham Sap means pervert in Cantonese)

Me, Jin and Dave was playing with his and his younger brother Ian. Scoottie
was like rolling all over the floor then *pow* suddenly head attack me. I
kena bully by a small kid. We 'fought' each other. It was fun but damn
painful. Ok, now this is when the Ham Sap thing comes in. When I was
walking towards Ian, Scoottie spank my arse! Ok la, I mean small kid just
playing, but... ahhhhh. That's not all also la, later when i sat down on
the floor, he sat behind me. I thought he just wanted to play so I didn't
bother. But thennn his two little hands flip my shirt up reveling a certain
amount of skin. Then he said something to me that left me speechless. My
conclusion? Small kids these days are not innocent man.

Well, enough of all that, I'm typing this entry from work. Going to email
this back and then later upload it since I'm not authorized to access the
Internet. Eh...errr OOPS
...I guess I wasn't fired. Anyone fell for it? HEHEHE *grin grin*

I understand now why people say when you work, you have no life. I want to make a correction on that, we still do have a life, just too damn tired to live it.

The second day of work was as boring as the first day but yesterday was dressed down Friday! Weee! I didn't know about that so I was in slacks and shirt. Aie, my bosses were all casually dressed. Anyways, I attended my first official meeting with the department/group. Free breakfast too! Yeah baby! Hehehe.

Anyway, I'm too tired to blog about stuff so just a summary of everything.

1. Walking from KLCC to Menara ExxonMobil is a hassle. I got attacked by the water sprinklers on the way home on Thursday. They actually have sensors along the walkway to sense people walking by. Unlucky me, I came across a few faulty sensors. I've got to beware of that.

2. I wear my sport shoes until the exit of the park. I'll change to my heels before entering the Menara. Hehehe, am I smart or am I smart? I guess I'm smart hahahaha. I don't have to walk from home to the LRT station and LRT station to the Menara on heels.

3. One of my colleagues, Tim, actually saw me at my graduation! He knows one of my classmates in APIIT. Small world isn't it? The world got even smaller when I found out that one of the team leads in my department/group actually stays near by and takes the LRT too!

4. Got to meet everyone but still cannot remember each of them, maybe my face ok ok la, but by names...LOL. I can't talk anymore about my work place and stuff I do because of the P&C thing la. I don't want to get in trouble.

I want to say thanks to Jin and Dave too for the BBQ dinner today. I ate the last 3 most marinated chicken wings, BBQ'ed to the most beautiful golden brown anyone could BBQ muahahhaah! Had fun.

Freaking tried now. Got to sleepppp. I want to go shopping tomorrow! I need slacks for work!

I just got back from work. How was my first day? Very very boring. Another guy came in as a 'new head' with me, we kind of grew mushroom together.

The first hour was all about getting to know everyone that was in the same department, after that was spending 7 hours just to read a 33 page manual. I read it more than 10 times. I got to know that all of our cubicles were only temporary because the original floor where we were all suppose to be was under renovation. So everyone was like relocated to two different floors at funny locations including walkways!

Me and Jaya (the other new guy) meet all 17 other staff in the department, but I didn't manage to remember all of them...17 la... need time. Didn't get to mingle with them because my cubicle was in a different room. I'm sitting next to my big boss now! Yikes! It's a open concept thing so staff and bosses sit together.

Ate lunch alone =(

But overall ok la. I'll be assigned a 'buddy' tomorrow to learn stuff from him/her. If i was giving the preference to pick the person, I know who to pick already. Huahuahua.

Tomorrow will be more exciting.

Arghh I can't log into my free webspace to upload pics for this blog!

The triple celebration feeling died down. I'm a little nervous now about my first day at work. I don't know what to wear... my new black pants shrunk when I wash them =( I still need to shop. I can't seem to find anything suitable during all my shopping sessions though =( How? I don't want to wear my ragged up black pants that I've worn for 3 years when I was in APIIT!

I thought a lot yesterday too. It hit me when me and Prakash were chatting about our future after I signed the contract. What's my next step in life? I really have no aim or goal at the moment. I need something to keep me going. What do people usually aim for after securing their first job? I think I need to start reworking my set of goals. Chapter 5: Goals of the 21 year old.

Today marks the beginning of the next important chapter of my life. Happy Wedding Birthday to me. Thank you for all your wishes.

I've got so much to say, but I’m just too jaded right now. The convocation drained all my energy. I've even cancelled dinner with my family because I was too tired to even eat. *sign* Pictures over here. Yawnnnn...gnite.

LOL! Yesterday was a good day. Very good day. I can't help but laugh and smile and talk nonsence cos...LOL!

Initially I was suppose to head down to Zouk for Paul Van Dyke, but me and Zhong lost interest and planned for a chillout session at Chill (in Phelio Damansara II). JK, Daren, Ven and one of JK's friend who is a chun chiq came too. Hehehehe half Japanese half Chinese. Anyway, while waiting for the people to come, Zhong won't stop staring at me. HEHEHEHE. I know man, when I'm happy I shine ;P

I'm looking forward for my dinner tonight! Yeee haaaa!

Triple celebration! My 21st Birthday, my graduation, and my first job!
Echo("
Congratulations !!!

I would like to confirm that you have been offered the Security Services Analyst (SSA) position in ExxonMobil. Your date of commencement would be Wednesday, the 15th of December 2004. You have to report to work at 8:00am.
");

WAHAHAHAHAHA I'M THE HAPPIEST WOMAN ALIVE! All I have to do now is go over to Kelly's on Monday for my contract and all is done. All is according to my plan baby! I love myself! WHAHAHAHA!

Thank you Jin for referring me to Prakash, thank you Li Keng for reviewing my CV and thank you to Chen Yoon for being my reference on my CV! Without you guys I wouldn't get the chance to work in ExxonMobil. And to people from ExxonMobil, I'm looking forward to working you all of you. YOSH!

There's nothing that can spoil my mood today. WHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I got all excited for nothing. Aie. I went to Kelly IT Services in KL today to register myself before I can head over to Menara ExxonMobil for my interview. During the registration I asked a few questions regarding the job scope and employment and found out something really important.

If I'm hired, I would be under Kelly IT Services but I will be outsourced to ExxonMobil. So Kelly will be my employer not ExxonMobil. Aiyak, no ExxonMobil employee benefits. But never the less, at least I would have some base and experience to later be a permanent staff of ExxonMobil later on. Being under Kelly wont be that bad either. They are after all one of the leading HR organizations around. If i choose not to continue my contract when it expires with ExxonMobil, Kelly will look for suitable jobs for me again. Not that bad lo right?

The interview went OK. It's quite different from my previous with Telekom. Although Telekom's interview was formal and interviewed by 'big fries' I didn't really feel nervous. Today's interview was very informal but yet I can feel my heart pumping so hard as though as I have just finish a 100 metre sprint. The interview was in a room with four cubicle (yeah...odd right?), which only one was used by the project manager. The other 3 space was empty. The interview was more like a get to know me session where both interviewers and me just sat in a circle and chat.

Ah then ah...whahahah ok I sound very 'jakun' so please excuse me, the smart building system damn chun man! I love the visitor pass with the built in chip and all that entering and exiting building procedure. Before the entrance of the lift, there's like a transparent barrier. If you touch-n-go your card on the pad, the barrier opens, just like in the movies! Whahahaha I just love the look of it. Hehehe.

Another candidate will be interviewed tomorrow for the same position. My interviewers told me that I should know if I get the job by Monday. So Monday only start to worry la.

Overall good day. I don't really know what I want to do tomorrow but shopping is on my mind. I don't know why I can't stop (window) shopping. No matter how many times I walk around 1U, I always see something new and something I like. Holidays kills the wallet HAHAHAHA.

On this day six years ago I was crying for someone. But today I have grown up and won't cry for anyone except myself. But let my cry today, let me cry, let me cry for joy. It's funny you know, when a person can feel sad, disappointed, angry and hurt, but also be overjoyed with happiness at the same time. So I came to this conclusion, when happiness takes over, I know I shouldn't be crying over milk spilt on me. I should just go shopping and buy a prettier dress to wear. *grin*

I'm very much excited and happy because I became serious for 5 minutes yesterday and sent an email to a job agency. And just after 2 hours, I got a call from them asking me if I was interested to work with people in ExxonMobil! *WooHoo* I will be going to ExxonMobil today for a job interview! *YESSS* Wish me luck people, I really want this job. This interview will definitely be must scarier and tougher compared to Telekom's.

I'm feeling nervous even now. I was all 'slumber saja' for Telekom's because I wasn't enthusiastic about the job, but this time is different. I have to find a way to calm myself later. I've got to remember to speak properly because my job scope requires me to talk to 'ang moh's' hence, the proper English that I want to project during my interview. Wahahahaha I want the job, I will have the job. Focus babe, focus.

Hopefully all goes well for me today. Today will definitely be a better day compared to six years ago. Today will be my day. Today I will make history for myself. Haik GAMBATTEH!!!

A few more days until my convocation. *wOOt*

I have nothing to do, yet I have so much to do. I have so much of time, yet I have not much time. What the heck?! Where have all my time gone to? To useless activities that are non-educational. I think bumbing around is quite bad for health. I'm starting to lose it. I'm itching for a proper job. I'm desperate to learn.

I want to start getting serious with my life. Not that I'm not at the moment, but, ...like to really do what I want to do and not let anyone stand in my way. It's time to gather my guts and speak my mind. I'll make history. LOL...ok enough of all that. But seriously, I think its time for me to really buck up. I have been slacking a lot. I should have finished writing my cover letters and stuff long ago but yet, none is finished till today. I can't be like this man. I need focus.

... ahh.. focus... yeah right. I'm off for a shopping session again. So much for focusing.

Even Ying Ying understood. I miss her a lot.

- Went back to Pangkor yesterday, reach home after lunch today
- My PC is acting up. Might be a power supply problem or my motherboard.
- Blogging from my other PC
- Yes, no mood to blog cos I need to fix my PC. ARGHHHHH!
- Another thing for couples to ponder ... I got it on email before. You sure she/he is the one? Thinks again.

I've been chatting with friends a lot lately on relationship topics. One recurring topic that came up was the "How do one really know if he/she is in love with the person, and not the relationship? "

I did some thinking on the difference. Loving a person means being there for a person no matter how hard the relationship is. Not all relationship are without barriers. Parents/friends acceptance might be one of the factors where a relationship can be difficult to maintain. Distance is another example of a barrier. But, is that all?

Loving the relationship means being comfortable with the relationship right? Maybe like Mr.A have been going out with Miss A for 5 years and is comfortable with it. They get married and stuff because Mr.A feels its stable, but in the matter of fact Mr.A already have no/less feeling for his wife. I mean some couples do that right? Why? Isn't that ...???

I seriously have no idea where this entry is leading too but I have another question in mind. If a person started of loving his partner, that doesn't mean he won't end up just loving the relationship right? Majority of relationships starts of smoothly, lovey dovey couples, but after sometime things get mundane. Or the relationship becomes a one sided effort. Or suddenly the relationship feels more like a user-and-abuser type of relationship. When all of this happens, when there's no more feelings left, why do one still hang on to the relationship? Do one realise that he/she is no longer in love with the person, and just love the relationship instead? And if one knows, holding on to the relationship is just like lying to oneself right?

To all couples out there, this is something for you to ponder upon. Do you love your partner, or the relationship?

A birthday is a birthday right? It doesn't matter if it's a 21st birthday or not right? Why are the 21st birthdays for everyone important? Why is it that the 21st birthday is always the big birthday? I mean birthdays are birthdays, it doesn't matter how old I am right?

I don't have the mood to celebrate my 21st birthday, at least not yet. Maybe my subconscious mind is telling not to turn 21 yet. LOL!

And yeah... I rejected the sales executive job offer. Why? No comment la.